25 thoughts on “Asexuality & Polyamory

  1. Ace Amoeba

    Nice video! I know, right? I can see how asexuality and polyamory can work
    hand in hand, but wouldn’t consider it easier to find partners because both
    groups are scarce as it is. What does Shirley think?

  2. schwindsichtiga

    Even though it sounds hard to believe, this was one of the most interesting
    and insightful videos I’ve seen in a long time. Thanks for being so
    blatantly honest.

  3. GaiaShirley

    @AceAmoeba OMG, definitely not easier to find partners! It makes it even
    more difficult. But also more satisfying when you find yourself in (a)
    really good relationship/s (:

  4. GaiaShirley

    @robobuska I don’t find many of these awesome partners, to be honest. I
    wasn’t looking for my life partner, she was just always there. And one of
    the problems with my current BF is that he isn’t polyamorous… He’s fine
    with my life partner, but the sexuality issue is back on the debate table.
    It’s more difficult to find partners this way, but easier to create a
    suitable relationship if you’ve found them.

  5. GaiaShirley

    @GucciGal93 About your questions – many asexuals masturbate, and so do I.
    My body can function sexually and can get sexually aroused – but I’m not
    attracted to other people and don’t want to have sexuality a part of my
    relationships. I started identifying as “asexual until proven otherwise”
    when I was 16 and I first heard of the term (I haven’t been proven
    otherwise yet πŸ˜‰ ).

  6. GaiaShirley

    @GucciGal93 I have some sexual experience, but not much. However, my sexual
    experiences have changed since I started identifying as asexual. I’m more
    aware of my feelings (or lack of them) and have more knowledge about what
    I’m going through in order to sexually experiment in a healthier way.

  7. GaiaShirley

    @sexualfuturist Thank you! I felt kind of bad doing this video on the spur
    of the moment when I haven’t made a sexualfuturist video for so long… πŸ™

  8. Sexual Futurist

    @GaiaShirley Don’t worry about it, your videos are worth waiting for. = )
    Glad so see your smiling face on any channel. Laci has served as part of
    our inspiration for how we YouTube. She was also named the 2010
    SexualFuturist of the year.

  9. willem oosthuizen

    Fascinating video. I’ve been single and celibate for almost nine years and
    I’m happy this way. I don’t quite know yet whether I’m asexual or just
    celibate (I feel like all kinds of odd since my recent discovery of the
    term asexuality) but the notion of asexual polyamory totally makes sense to
    me. I don’t quite know how asexual relationships work, but a close circle
    of compassionate partners sounds like a sensible thing. Thank you
    GaiaShirley for your interesting videos.

  10. GJCoyne

    Many different configurations of relationships can work beyond monogamy &
    you have found one which works for you. That’s lovely πŸ™‚ I have a partner
    who is asexual. I just love her and accept her as she is πŸ™‚ We are a total
    miss-match sexually! OKCupid might work for meeting asexual people? Thanks
    for posting this video and raising the profile of asexuality. I appreciate
    your honesty πŸ™‚

  11. harrishijiri

    Hello GaiaShirley, I am asexual and polyamorous. I am interested in your
    video, but I can not hear your English too fast for me, because I am
    Japanese. Do you have any writing place(for example blog) of your thought?
    I am in AVEN,Tumblr,Twitter,Google+.


    this i svery interstttting I have wodered if they can have like masterbate
    or they have no lust and can do itlike any onnne else on the Celbrate
    celacby page one said the reason I have never had sex is I h ave no desire
    and I think he might be happer that wy but low teratome harmone then he
    would be a euncu he abad paprto fthat is unlike animals humans lose mussle
    mas and will be week did he ell his Doctor I thinkk the first thing they
    might do is a test forlkinefelter syndrome very intesting

  13. Chaosdude7111

    I’m also asexual and polyamorous! I love the idea of “free love”, and don’t
    like the idea of limiting myself from expressing my love to other people.
    I”m currently single, and don’t like the idea of marriage, but the
    combination of asexuality and polyamory just works for me.

  14. ubiquitousfacts

    I think that polyamory involving asexuals is okay, but I couldn’t do it as
    a sexual person. I’d loathe the idea of someone else having sex with my
    partner. I’m too jealous and plus the fear of STDs is too great for me.

  15. Atypical Aeshe

    I absolutely love your discussion of this topic! Though I am generally
    sexual with many of my intimates, that is not always the case. For
    instance, in my time coping with and coming to terms with sexual abuse that
    happened to me, I have gone through periods of “sexual anorexia.” Polyamory
    allowed me to still feel very loved, connected, intimate and supported
    during times when sex, at least on my end, was just not on the table. This
    debunks so many of the orgiastic myths surrounding poly. πŸ™‚

  16. GaiaShirley

    Yeah, that sounds somewhat familiar – being able to feel loved, intimate,
    supported with the “limitation” of not wanting to have sex. I’m glad you
    enjoyed the discussion in the video, and I always like to debunk myths! (:

  17. Counted Shadows

    This was a very educational video and loved how you explained your
    sexuality and relationships. I would admit that I’m asexual who is
    definitely open to polyamory. Thanks for sharing this!!

Leave a Reply